Heh People,
Another day has begun and so has my exercise programme. I've gained 15 lbs and if you know me you know I cannot afford to gain 1! So I am walking, beginning slowly or else I'd get turned off. It's nice to be up and out early, today the sun was not out in all its glory, so it was a pleasant walk but yesterday! Who send meh to walk at 10:00 a.m.? That sun was hot and I was exhausted after just 20 minutes of walking so by the time I got home around noon, I was dead on my feet. I was telling the Lord, if I felt so bad after a morning stroll in the rainy season, He will have to help me lots, in the coming dry season.
Could not find my passport on Monday but sure found lots of things that I did not even know I was missing. This prompted me to begin to put things in a box for a give-away. I mean to say, how many shampoos do I really need especially since my hair is above my chin? Tell me, why do I have all those pairs of new socks and I still keep on wearing the ones where the bottoms have become like netting? Time to give away the new pairs because I bought them and don't like them and I'll never wear them. I've got perfumes, I've never used and of which I am sure the scent has changed -' Le Garbarge 'for them. In the search though, I found a Christmas card that I had given to my ex in 2000. I still like the words. I also found a poem written by me. It probably would have been more appropriate to print on my last post but here it is. Tell me what you think?
I thought when I became a wife
He would be proud of me..
I didn't know he would hate and malign me,
abuse and ignore me.
I never though he would take my life.
April, 2003
While there was never any physical abuse in my marriage the poem certainly reflects the pain I was going through. So ladies and gentleman, I am proof that you can survive a failed relationship. But seek a way out before your life is taken. Do not be afraid to search for support. You would be amazed that it can be found in the most strange of places and it may be for just an instance but baby, take it. I will tell you a story that begins with a friend and I sitting on the Brian Lara Promenade, it was a Holy Thursday, so we were discussing the upcoming long week-end and of course, I was speculating that again I would be alone, since my husband spent as little time as possible with me. While we sat there a woman came along and asked if she could share the seating. She looked rather morose. It was impossible for her not to hear our conversation. Suddenly the woman said, words to the effect, that if I found my situation to be a terrible one then listen and there she began to relate her story of the upcoming Easter week-end. She related that she and her husband had had a baby 3 months ago and that morning her husband told her that he would be out with his girlfriend for all of the the Easter week-end! So here is was that while my story seemed awful, someone else's was more painful. God allowed me to see this and gave me the opportunity to comfort someone via kind words and a flower, which had been given to me earlier, and which in turn, I passed on to her. Suffice to say, she and I would see each other from time to time in downtown Port of Spain. She has since been divorced, re-married and I hope that she has found happiness.
Later
Another day has begun and so has my exercise programme. I've gained 15 lbs and if you know me you know I cannot afford to gain 1! So I am walking, beginning slowly or else I'd get turned off. It's nice to be up and out early, today the sun was not out in all its glory, so it was a pleasant walk but yesterday! Who send meh to walk at 10:00 a.m.? That sun was hot and I was exhausted after just 20 minutes of walking so by the time I got home around noon, I was dead on my feet. I was telling the Lord, if I felt so bad after a morning stroll in the rainy season, He will have to help me lots, in the coming dry season.
Could not find my passport on Monday but sure found lots of things that I did not even know I was missing. This prompted me to begin to put things in a box for a give-away. I mean to say, how many shampoos do I really need especially since my hair is above my chin? Tell me, why do I have all those pairs of new socks and I still keep on wearing the ones where the bottoms have become like netting? Time to give away the new pairs because I bought them and don't like them and I'll never wear them. I've got perfumes, I've never used and of which I am sure the scent has changed -' Le Garbarge 'for them. In the search though, I found a Christmas card that I had given to my ex in 2000. I still like the words. I also found a poem written by me. It probably would have been more appropriate to print on my last post but here it is. Tell me what you think?
I thought when I became a wife
He would be proud of me..
I didn't know he would hate and malign me,
abuse and ignore me.
I never though he would take my life.
April, 2003
While there was never any physical abuse in my marriage the poem certainly reflects the pain I was going through. So ladies and gentleman, I am proof that you can survive a failed relationship. But seek a way out before your life is taken. Do not be afraid to search for support. You would be amazed that it can be found in the most strange of places and it may be for just an instance but baby, take it. I will tell you a story that begins with a friend and I sitting on the Brian Lara Promenade, it was a Holy Thursday, so we were discussing the upcoming long week-end and of course, I was speculating that again I would be alone, since my husband spent as little time as possible with me. While we sat there a woman came along and asked if she could share the seating. She looked rather morose. It was impossible for her not to hear our conversation. Suddenly the woman said, words to the effect, that if I found my situation to be a terrible one then listen and there she began to relate her story of the upcoming Easter week-end. She related that she and her husband had had a baby 3 months ago and that morning her husband told her that he would be out with his girlfriend for all of the the Easter week-end! So here is was that while my story seemed awful, someone else's was more painful. God allowed me to see this and gave me the opportunity to comfort someone via kind words and a flower, which had been given to me earlier, and which in turn, I passed on to her. Suffice to say, she and I would see each other from time to time in downtown Port of Spain. She has since been divorced, re-married and I hope that she has found happiness.
Later
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