Laying It Down

I was on my Facebook page and I looked over at that friends list and it says I have 149 friends! That's a lot of people to me!  Who are these people?  I decided to take a look...and yes, most of them I know really well. I lime wid dem, laugh and cry wid dim, wine wid dem, know dey chirren (I'm Auntie Jin to everybody).. I know dey sisters, wives and lady friends, know their brothers, husbands and boyfriends. Some of them were once my boyfriends. Heh! Some of them, their father is my father and de mudder and auntie, well she belong to me too. Unbelievable, I really KNOW all these people :)) . Absolutley Wonderful! Today, we buried a neighbour and the neighbourhood lost a friend.   She was old and not in the best of health so while we feel sorry there is some joy knowing that she is out of her pain.    I will miss her quick wit and sharp tongue.    My life changes just a little: like that first circle formed in the water when you drop in a pebble.  And that first circle exp

Those who know me know that I am a lover at heart.  Yes, I love to love and sometimes that means I love foolishly.  Sometimes, I don't even love them and they think I love them when all I am doing is being kind.  I have recognized that a lot of men think you love them: want to have  sex with them, simply because you share a plate of food with them.  Boys...I don't. With that said, I do believe that food is a love thing and that many of us have good memories surrounding food.    We cuddle at our mothers' breast drinking life-sustaining milk.  We celebrate life and death and in-between with food.  The 'breaking of bread' with someone is an act of trust for me.   For the past year I've been toying with the idea of relating stories of love and associating them with a particular food.  I want to relate the stories of ordinary people like myself, their tales of love, be it platonic, romantic, or agape' love.  So for example, my ex-husband courted me on mint c

50 Ways To Feel Loved I was sitting just resting my brain: you see I'm taking academic classes and the brain truly has not been in the study mode for many years so it begins to hurt very soon after starting to study. LOL!   As I was saying, here I am resting my brain when the song 'Fifty ways to leave your lover' ripples through my brain and out of my mouth.  I'm singing the song really loudly and laughter bubbles up.  I'm feeling happy.  But what if you don't have a lover to leave?  Or you don't want to leave your lover?  What is one to do? So I grab pen and paper and begin to think of something else, that is, 50 ways to feel loved.  Fifty ways that would make me feel loved.  In no particular order and with very little comment attached to each here is my list. Know that you're worth being loved. Give love. Praise and thank God. Smile. Hug someone. Listen with genuine interest to someone. Ask questions. Value someone - tell someone that

I'M BAACK! Gosh, I haven't posted for so long!  Sorry.  No, I have not curled up in a corner and died, but I'v come close.  The black dog has been visiting from time to time but I am managing to fight him off.  I was also in Europe and will blog on that soon.  I've got a lot to talk about and I am going to try to write at least 2x per month.  Today, I'll just roam all over the map. Do you enjoy movies? Have you been to the Trinidad and Tobago Film Festival?   http://www.ttfilmfestival.com/   It's pretty good.  They've got lots of options to see the featured  movies including through the local cable company and 'curfew cinema'    www.ttfilmfestival.com/curfewcinema      I managed to get to Habana Eva and I really enjoyed  seeing the scenes of Havana, watching the angst of the main character and...no, I'll say no more on that.  Make some time, give your support to the Film Festival by watching a movie.  O' yes, I got free postcards too!

When will we stop hurting each other?   Is it at all possible that we can stop hurting each other?    When will we practice honesty and truth.   We are so afraid of being hurt and in our quest to protect our hearts from hurt, we often ending hurting someone. When will we learn to LOVE ONE ANOTHER; to speak truth.  And in so doing learn that our hearts will hold out; our hearts are stronger than we know; we are stronger than we think, LOVE is stronger than fear and hurt. Happy Valentine Day!  Later

I woke up about 1o'clock this morning with ruminations that signified an appearance of the "black dog" so famously quoted by Winston Churchill.  I needed to connect with Spirit to remove that fear and apprehension; to face the world later in the day.  So I prayed and prayed and screamed and prayed and slept and prayed! The thing is though you pick up the newspapers and all one sees in the first few pages is tragedy.  Speak with friends and the state of life in TnT makes one want to drink!  I have no job, the kitchen upgrade is 8 days late, the house is upside down because of the kitchen works, I find it difficult to think in confusion and so on and so on.  I don't want to leave Trinidad but I sure as hell can't afford to re-create Exodus, so I must try something (where) different.  Where?  I am not convicted about any where. After 2 hours of being awake...doom and gloom, I could find nothing to make life seem bearable.  So I googled happy things.  Even before

Hi, Keeping on with the resolutions theme, I started to think of the things that I don't want to do this year and boy o' boy is that list loooong.  I figured that the little brain can only do so much so if I am adding resolutions I'd better subtract a few things too.  So here we go.  In 2011, I will not: 1. Say yes to everything that I'm asked to do.  It is time to be a bit more discriminating even if it ends up hurting feelings. 2. Feel guilty for not passing on all those Jesus emails.   3. Hang with those who offer no stimulation - mentally, emotionally or any of the other "allys" we use.  I have to admit that I do know some users and abusers who must be quietly phased out of my life.  Actually it may be easier than I think since if I cannot give them what they want I rarely see them. 4. Tell myself that what I need and want is impossible to obtain . 5. Feel awful about growing old in a space where "d youts" seem to be the only one

Hello, It's a beautiful day in Trinidad and I'm sure a just as beautiful day in Tobago too.  The sun is hot, the sky is really blue with fluffy white clouds and a wonderful breeze is blowing.  Looking at the day that God has made, I feel good!  My mind is grinning! Three days after the beginning of the new year I feel like writing about goals for 2011.  I've never made the making of new year's resolutions a habit but tend to do it on my birthday which is 2 days before the new year.  Birthdays always make me look at the past year, feel bad about the past year and resolve to do differently before the next birthday.  Most times in recalling the past year it seems that I've either been asleep and missed the cues that should have brought change or else I was like a hamster on a wheel - working my little legs off but not getting anywhere.  Well baby, all that has got to change.  Although I think the hamster on the wheel thing may stay because that just seems to be lif